Time to Invade the Man Caves!!

Men are hungry. No, not for the next latte or the latest iPhone. No, not for 6-pack abs or a corner office. Men are hungry for initiation - for a call into the battle and adventure and beauty that is crying out from their hearts.

One of the reasons I love the Psalms in Scripture is that David, a complex and interesting model of masculinity, tells it like it is. He's not going to speak to God through a filter, through a mask, and he's not going to sit there and beg for a plate of milk and cookies to make everything alright when his soul is being crushed and he doesn't see a way out. Shepherd, warrior, king...and, yet, he craved a deeper initiation, a more pressing closeness through prayer with God.

Today was one of those days when I wanted to just hide in a favorite part of my man cave - namely, the bedroom, blinds drawn, covers pulled tight, eyes shut tighter, phone turned off. Hiding. When I was called out...pushed out, dragged out by a Power greater than myself...I was led to Psalm 142 (written, by the way, when David was hiding in the cave):

"When my spirit grows faint within me, it is you who know my way. In the the path where I walk men have hidden a snare for me. Look to my right and see; no one is concerned for me. I have no refuge; no one cares for my life." (142:3-4 NIV)

Not exactly the way "a man after God's own heart" should act, huh? Not very kingly, huh? Not exactly the poster boy for the warrior spirit, huh? But how true this is of men's hearts today, wouldn't you say? Or maybe you wouldn't...

Maybe it's your heart that longs for refuge - longs for someone to care. Masculine initiation is about men caring for the hearts of other men fiercely enough to go into battle for them. The hidden snares of evil plague men's hearts at every turn - you know the ones you get trapped in. I do. But the initiatory journey is created...whether secular or faith-based...to offer a man a way out of the cave, an opportunity to stop hiding, and a chance to go into battle surrounded by a legion of men who will fight until blood, sweat, and tears have been spent in the glory of victory!

The month of March offers two such opportunities for men in the local Kentucky/Indiana region to step into the containers of the masculine journey, to be deeply initiated in ways that their hearts are hungry for.

One is called the New Warrior Training Adventure and is sponsored by the ManKind Project of Kentucky (http://www.kentucky.mkp.org/). It's a 3-day experiential men's initiatory adventure designed to challenge a man in ways, perhaps, that he's never been challenged before to look at himself and step into a life of vision, action, and mission. It will take place from March 30-April 1, 2012 in Bedford, IN (for more info, you can contact MKP Kentucky by calling 502.939.4333).

The other is called the Men at the Cross weekend and is sponsored by The Cross Ministry Group (http://www.crossmg.org/). It's a 3-day intensive men's experiential weekend where men come to experience a unique encounter with God and other men. It will take place from March 16-18, 2012 in Underwood, IN (for more info, you can contact The Cross Ministry Group by calling 502.216.1942).

Who do you know that's hiding in his man cave? Maybe it's a cave of money, power, sex, deceit, anger, sadness, shame, fear, busyness, despair, or wounds from a time long ago. It's time to light a torch, take up the sword, cry out for the strength, and invade the man caves around you and rouse the hearts of the men hidden in darkness. It takes courage to invite a man into the deeper journey of initiation...and it's never too late!!

Fierce Personality: A Review of "Beautiful Outlaw" by John Eldredge

It was December 2010. I arrived at the breathtaking Frontier Ranch in Buena Vista, CO to attend the Wild at Heart Advanced Boot Camp, led by author, co-founder, and director of Ransomed Heart Ministries, John Eldredge. During the 3-days in the Rockies taking a deeper look and walk with the interpersonal relationship with Jesus, this band of brothers over 350 strong from around the world was intrigued to hear Eldredge and his Ransomed Heart team (Craig McConnell, Bart Hansen, and Morgan Snyder) begin to talk about a new book about the life – and personality – of Jesus.

As 2011 winds down, I was asked to review Eldredge’s latest novel, Beautiful Outlaw (Faithwords, 225 pages), I was actually at a point where seeing that Jesus (or meeting with him in Scripture and more often than not misconnecting) was becoming difficult, labored, without much desire. I wasn’t 20 pages into the book when Eldredge – talking about how essential it was to discover the personality of Jesus…undraped by what might be happening in church or Christianity or churchianity or, worse yet, through the religious haze of what characterized most of what, Scripturally, were the arenas in which most of Jesus’ most awesome heart-to-heart cage matches took place – put a deeper truth on the tip of the sword:

‘What is missing in our Gospel reading – and in our attempts to “read” what Jesus is saying and doing in our own lives right now, this week – is his personality, undraped by religion. Let’s see if we can find this.’

Eldredge, author of such bestselling books as The Sacred Romance (co-authored with Brent Curtis), Desire, Wild at Heart, Waking the Dead, and co-author with his wife, Stasi, of Captivating and Love & War, exhibits courage and boldness deftly blended with a fluid and winsome narrative early on. In the pages of his Introduction, he uncorks a fine bottle of context:
“We don’t need further speculation or debate. We need Jesus himself. And you can have him. Really. You can experience Jesus intimately. You were meant to. For despite the vandalizing of Jesus Christ by religion and the world, he is still alive and very much himself. Though nowadays it takes a bit of uncovering to know him as he is.”

And, sadly, perhaps the drapes measured by most churches to fit the windows looking onto the personality of Jesus miss such things as his playfulness, fierce intention, his human face, extravagant generosity, and disruptive honesty. “The man shoots straight,” Eldredge says in a chapter about the honesty of Jesus. “Sometimes he’s playful; sometimes he’s fierce; the next moment he’s generous. This is the beauty of his disruptive honesty – you can count on Jesus to tell you the truth in the best possible way for you to hear it.” (p. 71)

This is the Jesus many, including myself, have been searching for. I thought I met Jesus six years ago for the first time. Eldredge, with a joyful wit and razor sharp (yet perhaps accurate) sting to some of his projections on the church, invites the reader into the scandalous freedom with which Jesus – as fully God and fully man – lives, the cunning he has (…and, oh man, does he use it, especially against street gangs like the Pharisees…), how his heart overflows with humility, trueness, and beauty, and how loving Jesus – really loving him as he is and is meant to be – letting Jesus be himself with you and through the daily encounters can fill one’s life and be the powerful winds to clear away the “religious fog.”

And the reader is invited to know Jesus in a revolutionary way, and Eldredge’s writing – and the challenge behind the questions – does drive some stakes into ground: Why does false reverence replace loving Jesus? Does knowing about God substitute for knowing God? Why shouldn’t power displays be confused for intimacy with Jesus? Isn’t the stereotypical ‘Christian service’ really just a substitute for friendship with Christ? Does the church offer – or prevail – under a trivial morality? I found Eldredge’s style to be a courageous blend of unvarnished aim for the heart of his readers and the unmistakable revolutionary images of Jesus that have been covered over by so much religious coatings. As the chapters unfolded towards the Epilogue, Eldredge is wistful yet compelling: “I am groping for the words that will somehow move you to hold on to this. The train blows its whistle; the mother chokes up and the father clasps the last handshake ever so tightly, because they know what is at stake. My friends, so much is at stake.” (p. 211)
While others may aim low to find fault with a sense of Eldredge (or other authors) positing solutions for the church if only it would listen and take action, a majority of voices seem to be queuing up to say, ‘Hey, yeah, this is the Jesus I ache to know and am ready to meet.’ In a sense, it’s a Gospel that needs to be read.

In conjunction with the release of Beautiful Outlaw, Ransomed Heart Ministries (http://www.beautifuloutlaw.net/) is offering a free download of a companion 18-part video series for the book, along with a free participant guide for small group study. As Wild at Heart (2001, Thomas Nelson) impacted so many men for the battle, adventure, and beauty in pursuing the heart of Jesus, Beautiful Outlaw and Eldredge so brilliantly and bravely challenges that “…a true knowledge of Jesus is our greatest need and our greatest happiness.”

A Look Ahead to OUTLAWCast!

I think about Colorado all the time...even today, walking home from the store in 90+ degree blazing heat, haze in my eyes, I was thinking about being accepted in the lottery for the upcoming Wild at Heart Advanced Boot Camp (Dec. 1 - 4, 2011 in Buena Vista, CO at gorgeous Frontier Ranch). More will be revealed...not even sure if it's my time to go again. My faith walk, especially this past year, has been tested like no other time since 2005 and Christ's capture of my heart and my sword. When John Eldredge and his awesome Ransomed Heart Ministry team took to the deeper sides of Wild at Heart last year, I came home with deep impact and much warfare against my heart ahead.

So I look forward to several events and invite all of the men reading this post to consider checking out John's live Webcast event. I'll be hosting a small gathering in Louisville, KY on Monday, November 14, 2011 from 7 until 9pm. Contact me at fontaine4christ@gmail.com for more information on attending if in the area.

Get ready for a review of Eldredge's latest book, Beautiful Outlaw. His Grace Amazing has requested an advance copy (publishing date mid-October), so come back for an insight into the playful, disruptive, and extravagant personality of Jesus.

Visit the Website at http://www.beautifuloutlaw.net/ for more up-to-date information on the book, John's live event tour behind it, and more resources. Don't forget you'll find all information about Ransomed Heart Ministry at http://www.ransomedheart.com

Come visit soon for information on how you can support my attending the Wild at Heart Advanced Boot Camp in December 2011.

The Pruning Season

'He cuts off every branch in me that bears no fruit, while every branch that does bear fruit He prunes so that it will be even more fruitful.' (John 15:2 NIV)

I am not a gardener; I've never had experience growing something with vines and branches, much less anything that required cutting and pruning to keep healthy and productive. I am, though, painfully aware that in my life right now I am being pruned by God.

A good friend of mine gave me a Slinky yesterday, that inexplicable toy of joy from my childhood that doesn't require an owner's manual or parental help to use...I can just pick it up and get to the joy of what it produces. Part of the dynamics "behind the fun," obviously, is the tension that creates the motion of the Slinky in use...a part of me has to be aware of it in my hands and what I am doing with my hands in order to create the joy. So, what does a Slinky have to do with pruning? Well, to me, it seems as if I would have to know what I plan to do with the pruning shears in my hand before I begin to cut away at the vine and branches before me...otherwise, I may not get the results (fruitful growth) that I desire for the plants before me.

So, too, it must be with God and me right now. He knows exactly what He wants to prune in me. Me? I'm not too sure what's going on - a part of me is afraid of someone coming at me with God-sized pruning shears and aiming for places in me and my life I don't want to have cut away. Some of these branches are just gnarly, overgrown, hazardous to the health of the vine, etc. Plants obviously need (desire) light, air, soil, water, along with good nutrients and care to grow and prosper. If I am spending too much time in the dark, away from fresh air, have stopped tilling the soil of my heart, am parched and hungry for the goodness of God, His Word, and the amazing talents of His transformation in my life, well...it's no wonder that the branches - to some extent - have stopped becoming fruitful.

His shears are handled deftly, accurately, with grace, mercy and love...they are pruning away such dead branches as my love affairs with pot and pornography. He is cutting away at such toxic branches in me of laziness to work, arrogance, and deceit. Right now, it feels as if God is clipping away at some thick, twisted branches of loneliness and loss of desire that have wrapped themselves dangerously around the root of my heart that, unless taken away, have the potential to do some great damage. I believe God knows that His pruning hurts me. I also believe that He loves me enough to hurt me a little to help me a lot.

Part of why the pruning season hurts so much right now is that I don't want to see some of these branches go. Just as I could help the overall life, growth and productivity of any plant by doing the positive things to it, I can also help create the unfruitful branches, too, by feeding them what they need to grow. This doesn't help the plant (me)...and any good gardener (a Master one, of course) would immediately feel led to prune whatever must be cut in order to save the plant. No gardener wants to see any plant die, just as I believe that God does not want to see any one of His creation miss the opportunity to return to Him and His love. Sadly, some plants die because they were not pruned. Even more sad is the reality that some of us in this world may suffer because of the inability to allow God in.

As the pruning season continues, I experience both the pain of the cuts and the healing that comes from them. I experience in all of this the tension of watching/feeling those unhealthy parts of me being taken out of me by God for a greater purpose (growth...being fruitful) and somehow knowing that something amazing will be happening as new branches are given space to grow.

Sort of like putting the Slinky at the top of the staircase and watching it walk itself down one step at a time...the man in me stands next to the boy in me and marvels in wonder, 'How does it do that?'

Men's Work: Do I Have What It Takes?

One question that I believe every man asks himself is, "Do I have what it takes?

If you are interested in men's work and what that answer looks like to you, please visit us at the ManKind Project of KY™ (http://www.kentucky.mkp.org/) or call 502.939.4333 for more information on local men's circles, men's initatory weekends, and more exciting connection for men seeking impact and breakthrough in their masculine journey.

Friend us (ManKind Project - Kentucky)or Fan us (New Warrior Training Adventure Weekend) on Facebook or Follow us on Twitter (@MKPKentucky).

Who's Your Poser? (A Self-Test for Men)

In his book Wild at Heart (2001, Thomas Nelson), author John Eldredge gives us a glimpse at Adam, the first man.

Adam is hiding. 'I was afraid because I was naked, so I hid.' (Gen. 3:10) Eldredge says, "You don't need a course in psychology to understand men...We are hiding, every last one of us. Well aware that we, too, are not what we are meant to be, desperately afraid of exposure, terrified of being seen for what we are and are not, we have run off into the bushes...Most of what you encounter when you meet a man is a facade, an elaborate fig leaf, a brilliant disguise." (p. 52)

Here's your mission, a sort of self-test for men (if you choose to accept it)...

This may be one of the most courageous things you can do as a man - and one of the most life-changing: Ask a few people you know very well to give you some feedback about you as a man.

Part of the test you can take before asking the question. Ask yourself this: "What words would I use to describe myself as a man? Are words like strong, passionate or dangerous words you would use?

On your short list of people to ask should be a few men you respect - men who model something that inspires your heart to be a better man. Also, ask the woman in your life (if you have one) what she thinks. Ah, feel your heart beating just a tad faster now, huh?

Bottom line: The Poser in each of us as men, that brilliant disguise, that "fig leaf," is always in the way of the authentic masculinity that God hardwired into each of us. And just because you may not believe in God doesn't mean you don't have a "fig leaf." Conversely, just because you believe in God doesn't mean you can't be in Poser mode.

The job of The Poser is to take away something essential to the nature of being a man.

Ask honestly; listen honestly; score honestly. And I would love to know what words you hear.

I heard: "Careful...diligent...high concern how I'm seen by others (ouch!)...prideful (ouch!)...passionate...self-absorbed at times (ouch!)...extremely intelligent...persuasive...intense...strategic." The man I asked to give me the feedback was a man I trusted to tell me the truth.

And that's the greatest weapon to defeat The Poser in me...tell the truth!

For more information on the ManKind Project of KY, please visit us at http://www.mkpky.org/
For more information on John Eldredge, please visit http://www.ransomedheart.com/
His Grace Amazing™ is a Web log of its creator, Johnny Fontaine, and not affiliated with either the ManKind Project™ or Ransomed Heart™.

Checking In

It's been a while; this I know. Most of the time in recent memory has been starkly resonant with the lack of God's voice. He is silent, quiet, still on His throne. "What is it that you are not saying?" This is the question I have fear to ask.

It seems late in life to be worried about being a better man, but that's exactly what my heart searches for. I want to be a better man. Sometimes I am - sometimes I am not. I know the difference. And sometimes I am afraid to get closer to Christ because He does not waver. How can I look upon anything that courageous for very long without feeling weak of heart?

And if I take a deep breath and a step back, I can see that the path He is leading me down has no map. It is His will to take me into the quiet places where the battles and the adventures come one after the other, where I feel out of breath and sometimes hope. God hasn't left my side for a moment - and that is a great comfort when I choose to go to war for the hearts of others.

I want to be a better man. That's something I can enjoy today as God blesses me with continued life. There are many opportunities for hope that surround me. I am not alone.

Father God...

Thank You for Your love and Your mercy. I need You to help me overcome. You are the strength I need to go on. Help me to become a better man. Amen.